blustering

a cold front has moved in. a few days after thanksgiving break, weather so typical to this city i loosely call home. the sky is darker than it was twenty minutes ago, and the snow falling on the ground outside is now blustering against my window. i have a few more hours before i have to get out of this dorm and meet up with some friends. until then... i listen, i learn... and i write.

i just got back a couple of days ago. what began as just another ‘break,’ soon became so much more. now that i am back "home", the lessons i have learned are sinking deeper into my heart... as lessons always seem to do, when forced again underneath the daily grind.

it took getting away, to finally find some much needed quiet time with the Lord. to realize how grateful i am for my friends, and their patience with me these past few months. it took being away, to help me decide that it is time i started playing, dreaming, creating again. too re-introduce me to the real people, the real needs hidden underneath the names and faces of those around me. and now i'm back home... home, where the will connects with my heart.

why do "home" and "being away" effect such great extremities within me? ever since i got my own car in 10th grade, going home has always been the difficult part... nothing has changed. i have tried to explain the chasm, or express it on the pages of journals. but this place is one where only the Lord can get to me - no logic, no theories can ever explain the things, the instances, the habits that He uses in our lives to keep us close to Him.

i may always live on the edge of a chasm... but when my feet slip, when i miss the cold weather, when i would curse this town, when my heart is full of love, or missing the open road... there He keeps me, there He pours His love on me. He connects will with heart, plans with purpose, and lessons with faith.

let the cold fronts come.